"But I, O Lord, cry to you; in the morning my prayer comes before you. O Lord, why do you cast my soul away? Why do you hide your face from me? Afflicted and close to death from my youth up, I suffer your terrors; I am helpless. Your wrath has swept over me; your dreadful assaults destroy me. They surround me like a flood all day long; they close in on me together. You have caused my beloved and my friend to shun me; my companions have become darkness." -Psalm 88:13-18 Asking the Hard QuestionAno na gagawin mo pag dumating ang panahon na parang di ka pinapakinggan ng Diyos sa mga panalangin mo? This is a hard question, pero napaka-critical na hindi lang natin alam ang isasagot natin sa tanong na ito, kundi buo ang ating resolve at buo ang ating confidence sa Panginoon bago pa tayo dumating sa ganitong season in life (sooner or later, we will). Magdadalawang taon na, and yet God isn’t answering any of our prayers na mawala o kahit kumupa man lang sana na ang COVID. Some of us have been praying for loved ones for years, pleading kay Lord na makakilala din sana sila sa Kanya, pero parang nananatiling kasing-tigas ng bato ang kanilang mga puso. Marami sa atin siguro'y umiiyak na, dahil kung kailan naging resolve na nating mahalin Siya ng ating buong buhay, tila'y doon pa tayo mas nakaranas ng pagsubok at paghihirap sa buhay. At ilang din sa atin ang nagkaroon ng mga mahal sa buhay na naratay sa banig ng karamdam, nananalangin na may kasamang luha’t durog na puso, claiming healing, for God’s mighty hand, hoping that the Lord will use ang buhay ng ating mga minamahal to demonstrate that He is really a God who Heals and answers prayers… and yet, after a long and painful season, COVID man ang sanhi or cancer, babawian din ng buhay ni Lord. I don’t intend here to discourage you, mind you, but to encourage us all we why should persist in prayer. Otherwise, our cries may not hold out through the storm. When Life Seems UnfavorableIf you’ve come into saving faith in Christ, it’s not a question that you hold God’s favor. God is not indebted to us, and yet, out of His sovereign will fulfilled in Christ, your life is now secured in the hands of Christ for all eternity. But also, unlike what many people have now come to believe, life is not all about “declaring favor” and “claiming victory”. Christ promised that He will be with us always to the very end of the age, but He did not promise that we will spared of pain and frustrations. Becoming a Christian does not automatically imply you’ll always be “destined” for the great things this life has to offer. Simply put, being a Christian doesn’t disqualify us from brokenness, loneliness, or getting hurt. Don’t get me wrong: Jesus will rescue us from a thousand evils, but it will not keep us from getting hurt in this life. And there will be times when those hurts are so amplified that we think that's all there is. Look at Psalm 88. Most psalms, even those that also deal with lament (nananaghoy din sa Panginoon) will end on the high note of hope, but Psalm 88 is none of them. It starts with pain [1] , and it ends in pain [2] [3]. Naexperience niyo na ba yung ganun? Hope doesn’t come. Happiness seems like a distant memory. You pray for the light to shine again, but the clouds are not going away anytime soon. [4] You feel overwhelmed, and parang habang lumilipas ang araw, mas nao-overwhelm ka. If you were with me so far, mapapatanong ka na nga lang din: “Lord, parang nagkamali Ka yata. Bakit naisama ito sa Bibliya?” But no; God, in His sovereignty, does not make mistakes. Here's a few observations kung paano tayo nilalapit ng Psalm 88 sa Panginoon sa isang pananampalatayang fully inclined towards prayer. First, God allowed this prayer to be part of the great story of Scripture.That’s the thing: we may wonder why God allowed a prayer like this na maging bahagi ng book of Psalms, ang "prayer book of the Bible". But all the same, nothing can take away from the fact that it is there. God is neither mocked, nor challenged na merong nananalangin in this manner. Somehow, this implies two things para sa atin: Una, this kind of prayer is valid. God is telling us by adding this psalm in the Biblical canon that moments like this sa buhay are bound to happen. They do happen! And comfort ‘yun para sa’yo at sa akin. Paano? Dahil kung ikaw ay isang Kristyano, at umabot ka na sa ganitong punto ng buhay, hindi ikaw ang unang Kristyanong naka-experience nito. You are not suffering alone. At kung umabot ka sa puntong makakapanalangin ka na din ng ganito, God will not cast you away. Ikalawa, God knows this is a prayer His church will need. The Bible is a practical book. We can oftentimes commit the mistake of treating the Bible like a corpse in autopsy in search of theological tidbits, but it’s not a dead thing; the Word of God is living and active! Everything that is here is meant for our benefit. It reveals to us kung sino si Lord, and even Psalm 88 does that. Kung valid na panalangin ang Psalm 88, and if the book of Psalms is the “prayer book of the Bible”, then it’s not a stretch to say na alam ng Panginoon that this will be a prayer that the Church will identify with, and perhaps, pray along to. Why? Tulad ng nasabi natin kanina, being a Christian doesn’t disqualify us from brokenness, loneliness, or getting hurt. At hindi 'yun ini-invalidate ng Diyos. God knows this is a prayer His Church will need, and it is a prayer that God will hear. Ikalawa, it reminds us that we can take up our complaints to God.Sinimulan ang Psalm 88 with the words, “O Lord, God of my salvation”, then that’s it. Puro pananaghoy na ang makikita natin pagkatapos nitong six words. Puwede nating himayin ang mga verses, pero all we find is the author asking all the hard questions. Kulang na lang ay di na lang siya manalangin altogether. It’s as if he's in a fog o kaya’y nasa gitna ng malaki’t madilim na kwarto: nakabukas man mga mata mo o nakapikit, it doesn’t seem to make much of a difference-- walang makita, walang makapa, walang nagbibigay-ideya kung makakalabas pa siya sa sitwasyon na yun. [5] Nagsasalita pa din siya—from the pain, in the pain, through the pain. Kahit man lang pabulong na dahil hindi na kaya ng lalamunan, even though parang wala na siyang maiiiyak, yet he looks to heaven and say, Nandito ako ngayon, Lord. This is how dark it feels. As strange as it sounds, praying in lament is actually a form of praise to God. Pag tayo ang nananaghoy sa paanan ng banal na Diyos, we actually praise Him. At hindi lang yun, ine-express natin na talagang naniniwala tayo sa Kanyang mga pangako. Why? Because lamenting involves taking God at His Word. [6] We give thanks when we see God’s loving faithfulness in display. It’s in the same heart kung bakit tayo nagrereklamo: hindi dahil entitled ka sa anumang bagay, kundi dahil hindi mo makita ang loving faithfulness ng Diyos, so you call on God to act. Nananaghoy ka out of the darkness of your current situation, calling it out before almighty God. Kung ang Diyos ay hindi worthy of trust, you wouldn’t invoke God’s presence anymore. Kung wala kang tiwala sa Diyos, you’t won’t find any reason to pray. If we believed God was unkind and limited, there would be no cause for complaint. But this is why we pray anyway: dahil kilala mo kung sino ang Diyos—na Siya ay sovereign, at Siya ay isang covenant-keeping God. Laments talk to God about the disconnect between our theology and our experience. We know that God hears, that God is never far away. And because of that, we lay open our hearts—with all of our half-formed desires, disappointments & uncomfortable emotions, but we do so before a covenant Lord na mas kilala tayo far better than we know ourselves. Lament was how we prayed because we believed. [7] Ikatlo, it compels us to be reminded of the providence of God.Everything sa Psalm 88 ay naka-angkla doon sa unang phrase sa verse 1: "O Lord, God of my salvation". Yun lang ang pundasyon ng manunulat sa kanyang pananaghoy. Hindi niya alam kung bakit kailangan niyang dumaan sa ganoong estado ng buhay, pero alam niya na Siya ay Diyos at ang Diyos na nakakapagligtas. We don’t hold all things, we’re not in control, but we know who does. It is by faith na lumalapit tayo. We do so with tears, yet we trust and hope. But also, it would be wrong for us to simply be stoic about the sovereignty of God, as if walang room to process pain and that we're just meant to say, "it is what it is", as if God doesn't care how we process with life. At the same time, it is wrong for us to isolate a psalm from the rest of the songbook. Tandaan natin: it’s a prayer book, and it's all directed to the one and the same God. Puwedeng magbago ang ating mga sitwasyon, ang ating mga pinagdaraanan, pero hindi nagbabago ang Diyos. And more so, our circumstances don’t alter God’s character. Our hope in the unchanging character of God cannot be taken away. In other words, the God of Psalm 88 is also the God of Psalm 23, and this is why the psalmist prays. Ito din ang dahilan natin kung bakit dapat patuloy pa din tayong mananalangin, never allowing suffering to make us bitter toward life or cold toward God. There is more comfort into this: painful at dark man ang naging content ng Psalm 88, but it did refine the heart ng manunulat. In the final analysis, nakita natin na nasa tamang lugar pa din ang kanyang puso, maging sa kalagitnaan ng kanyang sitwasyon. While he acknowledges that the pains he experiences come from God’s hand, he also cries to the same God for relief. We don’t know anything else mula sa buhay ni manunulat, and yet here we are: learning from him what it means to honor God even in suffering. We do know that God is sovereign even in difficulty. But more than that, God enacts His sovereign will in all things according to His purpose-- mainly for His glory, but also for our good. That is what it means to have the providence of God. The Heidelberg Confession puts it this way: Providence is the almighty and ever present power of God by which God upholds, as with his hand, heaven and earth and all creatures, and so rules them that leaf and blade, rain and drought, fruitful and lean years, food and drink, health and sickness, prosperity and poverty— all things, in fact, come to us not by chance but by his fatherly hand. Take note: by His fatherly hand. What then, could we take from there? Again, from the Heidelberg Confession: We can be patient when things go against us, thankful when things go well, and for the future we can have good confidence in our faithful God and Father that nothing in creation will separate us from his love. For all creatures are so completely in God’s hand that without his will they can neither move nor be moved. The Lord, in His providence, has given us Psalm 88. As dark & raw as it was, it reminds us that we can cry out to God with a broken heart and that he hears us—no matter how weak our hearts may be. It directs us to focus on the truth of who God is, for even in the darkest night, His grace still shines. ConclusionDarating at darating tayo sa mga pagkakataong all we'd want to do amidst the pain, the injustice, and the ingloriousness is to cry out and rightfully lament: "How long, O Lord?" (Rev. 6:10) What causes us to persist in prayer amidst the darkness? It's that we yearn for the day when our faith will be sight, and it's a yearning anchored fully on His promises. So patuloy ba tayong mananalangin for healing, even when we don’t know if ipagkakaloob ba ng Diyos? Yes! Do we keep praying even when the situation seems hopeless? Yes. A comfort we also hold is that we’re not alone dito sa mga panahon na tila parang ang dilim. On the darkest of days, from a hill called Golgotha, there is one who was also forsaken by all. Darkness became His closest friend. Maging ang Kanyang Ama ay binaling ang tingin mula sa kanyang anak, and so he cried, “Father, Father, why have you forsaken me?” Amidst that forsakenness, He prevailed and swallowed the darkness. Though His people today may feel abandoned by all, our Shepherd will never let us go walk in the valley alone. He walks that road with us. He prays those prayers with us. He fills us with his Spirit, and lifts our burdened souls by His grace. By His cross and victory, Jesus holds us especially when it hurts. Yes, this world is not our home. But we also know Jesus is King and His reign is supreme. This is why we can look at our tomorrows with peace and pray with anticipation & godly impatience. The glorious vision of the new heavens and the new earth causes us to lament, bakit wala ka pa din, Lord? And yet we know that every tear of every saint will not go unnoticed. This world is not our home, but Christ will come again to make all things new, then, we will be at home with Him. And we will cry no more. === This article is a primarily taken from this sermon of the same title delivered last August 22, 2021. You can watch it in full below. Endnotes
[1] Verse 1, “I cry out day and night before you.” [2] Verse 18, “My companions have become darkness.” [3] Hindi natin alam exactly ang kalagayan ni Heman the Ezrahite, yung composer nito from among the Sons of Korah, kung bakit niya naisulat ang salmo na ito. What we can clearly see, however, is that he was seriously depressed. He is battling constantly against a relentless darkness. Kung hihimayin natin ang awit, sinabi niya na struggle na niya ito mula nung kanyang kabataan (v. 15). Sa verse 14, pakiwari niya’y pinabayaan na siya ng Diyos. Maging ang kanyang minamahal at mga kasamahan, pinabayaan na siya, looking at verses 8 at 18. Verses 13-14, Heman is saying that he was desperate, and yet ang hinihimutok niya ay hindi sinasagot ang mga panalangin niya kung kelan kailangan niya ng tulong na walang iba ang makakapagbigay. Verses 3 at 15, he was so overwhelmed that he felt close to death. [4] Sometimes, we remind ourselves that trials are meant to purify us. 1 Peter 1:6-7 does say that trials produce a faith that is tested, refined, and full of glorified joy. Pinapaalalahanan natin ang ating mga sarili that we can boast sa ating kahinaan because, as Paul says in 2 Cor. 12, God’s strength is made perfect in our weakness. Now, dapat nating i-preach sa ating mga sarili ang mga ito when trials come. Pero minsan, whether you’d like to accept it or not, darating ang mga pagkakataong as if your heart is no longer moved by these truths at all. Itong mga deep realities, yes, these can create deep hope for us in times of deep pain, except sometimes we don’t feel it. We pray and pray and pray, pero napapagod ka na din. [5] Tingnan ninyo ang verses 10-14: 10 Do you work wonders for the dead? Do the departed rise up to praise you? 11 Is your steadfast love declared in the grave, or your faithfulness in Abaddon? 12 Are your wonders known in the darkness, or your righteousness in the land of forgetfulness? 13 But I, O Lord, cry to you; in the morning my prayer comes before you. 14 O Lord, why do you cast my soul away? Why do you hide your face from me? Kung iko-compare natin ang kung anong alam natin na character ng Diyos sa mga ibinabatong tanong ng author sa verses 10-12, magiging malinaw ang ugat ng kanyang paghihinagpis sa verse 14. Tandaan din natin kung papaano idinescribe ng psalmist ang kanyang sarili sa verses 3-9: malapit na siya sa puntod ng kamatayan (4), as if patay na siya (5a), nasa gitna na siya ng kadiliman (6), at pakiramdam niya’y nakalimutan na siya (5b) Verses 10-12 addresses those things to the finest points. Kung ire-rephrase natin itong bahaging ito, it is as if sinasabi niya: “Lord, kilala kita: alam kong walang imposible Sa’yo. Alam kong walang makakapaghiwalay sa’kin mula sa pag-ibig mo, maging ang kamatayan. Makikita ko ang kabutihan at kadakilaan Mo anuman ang sitwasyon ko. Pero, Lord, bakit hindi ko ito makita ngayon?” [6] Summarized statements mula kay Pastor Mark Vroegop sa kanyang libro, "Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy: Discovering the Grace of Lament". [7] Mula din kay Pastor Mark Vroegop sa kanyang article sa Credo Magazine: "It Takes Theology to Lament" [8] Look at verses 6-8 at 15-18, and observe kung papaano nire-relate ng composer sa Diyos ang mga nangyayari sa kanya. Heman incites na ang Diyos ang prime mover sa lahat ng nangyayari sa kanya. But it should also be noted that while it can be that the writer is accusing God sa lahat ng mga kapaitang nangyayari sa buhay niya, but we cannot disregard the fact na sinasabi niya ang lahat ng ito in light of his opening description sa Panginoon bilang “God of my Salvation”.
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